TikTok Got Mad At Me For Posting Nudes

The path to the Elusive Tasteful Nude is lined with booby traps.

No time for chit-chat? Head to the bottom of this newsletter for all my (shoppable!) finds

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Certified ETN currently on Etsy (linked below)

A commenter on TikTok recently inquired about how to find “tasteful nudes”. I scoured my sources, coined a method, and pressed “post”. Hands behind my head, I waited for the likes to roll in. Instead, TikTok promptly removed the video for “violating community guidelines” and slapped my wrist with a bright red “warning”. Well joke’s on you TikTok— you’ll be dead by the end of the week and I? I have a Substack.

There are 3 major factors to consider when searching for the Elusive Tasteful Nude (ETN). Let’s get into it:

Medium

Not an ETN. The medium (digital photography) is too literal, there is no abstraction, and the subject is too posed.

Certain media lend themselves more to ETNs than others. Photography, for example, is risky; it is a literal medium by nature, and leaves very little room for imagination. Even with artful shadows and obfuscation, it often leans more “boudoir shoot” than I want on my walls.

Safer bets include charcoal (try search term “charcoal figure study sketch composite”), pastels, and sumi ink. Why? Charcoal, pastels, and sumi ink are more gestural mediums, which allows for less literal interpretation and more abstraction. Which leads me to my next point:

Charcoal, sumi ink, and pastels are generally a safe bet for an ETN: they are too gestural a medium for detail overdose. (Linked below)

Abstraction

The ETN needn’t insist on it’s own dishabille. The more abstraction, the safer the bet. A single brush stroke can imply the human form. Steer clear of nudes that over-explain and give away too much.

Zero abstraction on this pencil drawing. Not an ETN.

Plenty of abstraction. Certified ETNs. (Linked below)

Subject

This (beautiful!) subject preens for the viewer. Her pose leaves little room for play with shadow and texture. There is very little abstraction or creative interpretation. Don’t let the brush strokes fool you: it’s not an ETN.

I had 8AM figure drawing classes twice a week in art school. The models often had skin texture, protruding bellies with folds, and cellulite on their thighs and arms. An instructor explained that such features were necessary to teach students how to draw: a svelte model with taut skin would inspire line drawings instead of experimentation with shadow, depth, and texture. It’s a much simpler task to draw a long, lean leg than it is to draw an aging, dimply one. Now, when I see artwork portraying subjects with taut skin in “flattering” poses, all I can think is “that’s easy”. Bring on the lumps, bumps, folds, texture, and unlikely subjects.

Then there is the landmine issue of the male gaze in nude art. Without getting too into the weeds here, I can say that I prefer art where the subject appears caught in natural motion, as opposed to preening for the viewer.

No preening, no centerfolds. ETNs. (Linked below)

Below, links to shoppable ETNs available now, ranging from $34 to $1900: